Being Good

Setting: It's bedtime, and Mom is having a discussion with Emma on the coming events for Christmas day.
Mom: "We need to go right to sleep tonight, so Santa can come."
Mom: "And remember, we have to be good, and Santa will come to Grandpa and Grandma Schmidt's house."
Mom: "Do you understand?"
Emma (nodding her head): "We can't hit Santa"

Sad

Setting: Mom has just tucked Max into his sleeping bag after a late bedtime at Omi, Oma, and GrandBobs.
Max (rubbing his eyes and "moaning"): "Mom, ask me why I'm sad."
Mom: "Why are you sad, Max?"
Max: "Because it's bedtime and I am not tired."

Grandmas

Setting: The family is just a few miles away from arriving at their destination in Southeast Wisconsin.
Max: "Mom, where are we going."
Mom: "To Omi and Oma's, Max."
Max: "And GrandBob's."
Mom: "Yes that's right. And GrandBob's"
Max: "They are my Grandpa and Grandmothers."
Mom: "That's right, Max."
Max: "My grandmothers always love me."

Happy Hanukkah

Setting: Periodically Max or Emma will request a candle light dinner. Max had just learned about several of the seasonal holidays in December. That night he requested a candle light for dinner. As Mom is walking toward the table with the candle...
Max: "Happy Hanukkah!!!"

Coughs and Sneezes

Setting: Max was sneezing a few times during the morning breakfast. Emma enters the kitchen, having just woken up.
Emma: "I have the coughs and Max has the 'Bless Yous'."

It Popped

Setting: Dad was putting Emma to bed. He said good night, blew her a kiss, but then she reminded him that he didn't sing Twinkle Little Star. So he did and was heading out the door.
Emma: "Dad, blow me a kiss."
Dad: "I did. Before Twinkle Little Star."
Emma: "Yeah, but it popped."

A number

Setting: Dad is trying to tame Max's hair after Mom had blow dried it the previous night.
Dad: "Man Max, Mom sure did a number on your hair."
Emma: "Daaaaad!!! I don't see a number!!"

Reach Higher

Setting: Lincoln automotive has a televison commercial out with the slogan: "Reach Higher".
Setting 2: Mom and Max are leaving a store. They are looking at a Mini Cooper in the parking lot. Then Max looks in a different direction.
Max: "Mom, look. It's the Lincoln Reach Higher truck."
Max points to a Lincoln Mark LT pickup truck.

A deep breath

Setting: Dad is playing a game with Emma. Emma is directing every step of game play and Dad has surrendered in attempting to understand it. He lays down on his back.
Emma: "Dad, you have to sit up to play the game."
Dad: "But I want to lie down for awhile."
Emma: "If you don't sit up, you can't play the game with me."
Dad (decides to start "crying")
Emma: "If you don't stop crying you can't play."
Dad (continues to cry and moan): "I can't play anymore!!"
Emma: "You can't play until you stop whining."
Dad (works to stifle his sobbing)
Emma (patting Dad's shoulder): "Take a deep breath...Take a deep breath."

The White House

Setting: Max had just watched a TV special on the gingerbread house at The White House.
Max: "Can we stay at The White House?"
Mom: "No, we can't stay there. But maybe we could visit sometime."
(pause)
Max: "Do they have toys at The White House?"

Space Reservation

Setting: Max joins Mom and Dad in bed. Max is next to Mom. Emma comes in the room. She wants to be next to Mom. Dad tells her to crawl in between Mom and Dad but first go to the bathroom.
Emma: "I don't have to go to the bathroom."
Dad: "You have to go before you can come into Mom and Dad's bed."
Emma (more upset): "I don't want to!!"
Mom: "Emma, you can use the bathroom or go back into your room."
Emma (crying at this point): "Well, save my spot!!!"

Number One

Setting: Max, Emma, and Dad are traveling somewhere in the minivan. Emma is looking out the window.
Emma: "Dad, the birds are doing number one!"

Dad hesitates before responding. He contemplates where Emma may have learned about "number one". He contemplates how she could possibly see birds "doing number one" from a moving minivan. Then he finally realizes that the three of them had witnessed Canadian Geese flying in formation about a week before. In that formation one side of the "V" formation was much shorter than the other. It made it look like the number 1.

Flip Flops

Setting: Reading a bible story before bedtime. Emma notices something in the picture.
Emma: "Look! Jesus is wearing flip-flops."

Like Emma

Setting: Mom is finishing fixing Emma's hair before Church on Sunday.
Mom: "Emma you look beautiful, just like Beauty" (from Beauty and the Beast)
Emma: "I don't want to be like Beauty! I want to be like Emma."

Cold Chocolate

Setting: Max, Emma, and Dad went for a walk after dinner. It was about 19 degrees (F) outside. Max and Emma requested hot chocolate upon their return. As they are drinking the hot chocolate, Max is complaining that the hot chocolate is...well...hot.
Mom: "Max, you want the hot chocolate to be hot so it warms you up on a cold day."
Max: "That's right. And in the summer, when it's hot, we can have cold chocolate to keep us cool."

Early

Setting: It's Friday, 8am, Max and Emma are still sleeping. School is at 8:45. Dad quietly walks into Max's room debating the merits of waking him. As he watches, Max stretches, rubs his eyes, sits up and...
Max: "I wake up...and all I wake up is early."

Kapoof

Definition:
Kapoof (ka - POOF) v.
1. to cause magic to occur

Max: "...and Kapoof! he turned into a frog!"