Healthy Food -- Part 3

Setting: It's evening, and Max is explaining to Mom why he doesn't want to go to bed right now.
Mom: "Why don't you want to go to bed, Sweetie?"
Max: "'Cause I'm scared."
Mom: "Of what?"
Max: "Of monsters."
Mom: "Max, so what are the three coping strategies we talked about?" (yes, she really said that)
Max: "I can sing, I can pray, ...."
Mom: "..right, and you can talk to Maize"
Max: "OR...I can tell the monsters to GO AWAY!"
Mom: "Right."
Max: "GO AWAY OR I'LL EAT YOU UP!"
Mom (startled): "What do monsters taste like?"
Max (pondering): "Well, I suppose monsters are not healthy food."

Perfect

Setting: Max and Emma are eating breakfast on the deck in the bright morning sunshine. When checked on again, Max has moved from sitting on one of the plastic patio chairs to sitting under the table.
Mom: "Max, why were sitting under the table?"
Max: "Because I didn't want to sit on the chair."
Mom: "Why didn't you want to sit on the chair?"
Max: "Because it was too hard. So I sat under the table and it was just perfect."

Stinky bathrooms

Setting: The campground Dad, Emma, and Max visited with family had a pit-type latrine that did give off some strong odors at times.
Setting 2: Max, Emma, Dad, and Mom have left Grandpa and Grandma Vs late at night after celebrating Auntie Patties Birthday. Mom and Dad decide to stop at a gas station to have Emma go "potty" before she falls asleep in the car. As they pull into the gas station...
Emma: "Does it have a stinky bathroom?"

Negotiation 101

Setting: Dad is assisting Emma in getting dressed for school.
Emma: "Dad, can I wear my flip-flops (sandals)."
Dad: "No, Emma, I want you to wear your sneakers today."
Emma: "Can I wear my Butterfly shoes?" (slip-on shoes with butterflies on the outside)
Dad: "I suppose you can wear those."

pause

Emma: "My friend Becca (from school) has flip-flops."
Dad: "Thats nice."
Emma: "Can I wear my flip-flops to school?"

The Waitress and The Mosquito

Setting: Day one of camping Emma was writing down food orders from all the campers in her notebook.

Setting: Day 2 Max was being "stung" (kissed) by the Auntie Claranna Mosquito.
Setting: Emma attempts to become a Mosquito and kiss Max like Auntie Claranna. She is holding her notebook while doing this.

Max: "No! No! Waitresses can't be mosquitos!"

Chips

Setting: Dad, Emma, Max, and Auntie Patty are off to meet up with Grandpa and Grandma V and Uncle Mark, Aunt Claranna, Christopher, and Jonathan in Wisconsin for some camping. They stop at Sams to pick up some groceries including some Sun Chips. As they are driving from Sams to Hudson...
Emma: "Dad, can I have some chips."
Dad: "Wait til we get to Grandpa and Grandma V's house."

Two minutes later

Emma: "Dad, can I have some chips."
Dad: "Wait til we get to Grandpa and Grandma V's house."

Two minutes later

Emma: "Dad, can I have some chips."
Dad: "Wait til we get to Grandpa and Grandma V's house."

Two minutes later

Emma: "Dad, I really love chips."...

Dad says

Setting: Mom is eating breakfast with the Max and Emma while Dad continues to sleep. Emma asks Mom nicely for yogurt. Mom gives Emma her leftover yogurt from yesterday.
Emma: "What kind of yogurt is this?"
Mom: "It's peach cobbler, Honey."
Emma: "No it's not. That's not what Dad says."

Note: 15 minutes later Dad arrives in the kitchen.
Emma: "Daddy, what kind of yogurt is this?"
Dad: "Oh, it's peach cobbler."
Emma: (Nods her head in agreement and smiles contentedly)

Penguin

Setting: Emma has finished going to the bathroom and is whining loudly for Daddy to help. When no help arrives, she waddles into Max's bedroom with her underwear and pajama bottoms still rolled down to her knees.
Mom: "Here Emma let me help you pull your underwear and pajamas up."
Emma (now giggling): "Yeah, I walked like a penguin."

Angel

Setting: Max is playing with a flashlight he received at a friends birthday party. Mom looks up from the bottom of the stairs as Max stands one step above Emma and points the flashlight down over her head.
Max: "I'm making Emma an angel."

Meatball

Emma: "Momma, a nectarine pit looks just like a meatball."

Gently

Mom: "Emma, please don't slam the door. It hurts Mom's head when you do that."
Emma: "Can I close the door gent-a-lee?"

The Power of Pink

Setting: Dad is getting Emma a cup for milk for breakfast.
Emma: "Daddy, I want the pink cup."
Dad: "Emma, there is a blue cup and an orange cup."
Emma: "Where is the pink cup?"
Dad: "It probably hasn't been cleaned yet. It's still in the dishwasher."

Pause

Emma: "Can you wash the pink cup?"